Relationships: Being an Extravagant Reflection

"We must love our neighbor as being made in the image of God and as an object of His love."

 - Saint Vincent de Paul

The Church teaches, and Scripture teaches, that man is made in the image and likeness of God; "Let us make mankind in our image, in our likeness," (Genesis 1:26) Obviously He did not only make man (Adam), but also woman (Eve), and He made us that way for a couple purposes, especially being found in the marital act. The Church teaches that the marital act has a twofold purpose; unity, husband and wife being united in one flesh (Genesis 2:24), and also procreation (Genesis 1:28), husband and wife taking part with God in the creation of new life. Along with the actual marital act, there is the parental duty of raising the children in a life lived for God alone. 

However, we must also understand the divine implications of the marital act and even of the love between a couple even before marriage (however, it's realized and understood fully in marriage); the love between a couple, especially between husband and wife, is a reflection of the love of God, for God, Who is Love, is a communion of Persons. With this, we understand the most important thing in any relationship; to be someone through whom God's overflowing love can flow to the other person, to lead the beloved to Christ through your being a reflection of His love for them. In his letter to the Ephesians, St. Paul commands this reflection when he writes, "As the Church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the Church and gave Himself up for her, so that He might sanctify her". For husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the Church, they must be a conduit for His love to flow through, and it is the same for wives, For God, Who is Love Itself, is passionately in love with each and every one of us, and He has made the bond between men and women, learned about in our interaction with one another and realized especially in marriage, able to show His love for us, His Bride.

Of course, it's not just in marriage, in romantic relationships, that this can be found. Any kind of love between people, actual, agape love, is reflective of our Lord's love for us, as well as reflective of the love between the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. However, the love of the Trinity can be clearly seen in marriage, when husband and wife love each other, and the outpouring of their love begets another person, just as the Holy Spirit is the procession of the love between the Father and the Son. Yet even before marriage, couples should seek to be the reflection of this love for each other even though they should not yet do so in the conjugal and marital act, for they aren't yet completely bound to each other yet. There are different ways that each couple can do this, of course, but most important are praying together, reading and/or discussing Scripture together, going to Mass and Adoration together, and encouraging each other in all spiritual matters, for it is in the ways that we grow closer to our Beloved Lord that we most grow closer to each other.

Again, the point is that those of us who are called to marriage and are courting are called to be reflections and conduits of our Lord's love for each other. Anyone can be that for anyone at any time, of course, but it's especially important in such a personal relationship like a romantic one leading to discerning for marriage, for in marriage is found that greatest reflection of God's love. But we are called to be so even at the beginning of a relationship, to be a sign and giver of His love for the other, for our beloved, for this is how relationships can bring us closer to our Lover of Lovers.

All of you holy men and women and all of you angelic choirs, especially Pope Saint John Paul the Great and St. Raphael the Archangel, please pray for all of us who are called to marriage!

All you readers, please pray for the writers of this page and for their vocations! 

The Sacrifice: What is Love (Feelings Don't Hurt Me)

"Faith... Is the art of the holding onto the things your reason once accepted in spite of your changing moods." - C.S. Lewis

Today, on this Sunday, the 21st of September in the year of our Lord 2014, literally the most incredible thing ever happened. I, along with so many others, physically, actually, and completely received GOD HIMSELF in the bringing forth of the greatest act of love ever; Christ's Sacrifice on the Cross, His giving His own Body and Blood to us.

And yet, when I went up there and received the King of Kings and Lord of Lords, the Savior of the World, the Heavenly Bridegroom espoused to us by the Father... I didn't pay much attention to it. I went up as usual, like almost every Sunday, to receive Love Himself, and I didn't pay much attention to it. I noticed it right beforehand and right after, that I was in a sort of automation and have been so for a while now. It's not that I've necessarily done something wrong, although that does contribute a lot to being distracted from this greatest event of all time; It's my own mood that's changed. I don't know how, and I don't know when, but somehow I've slipped into a sort of "going-through-the-motions" mood, though I never wanted it. I've asked God before today, today, and I'll probably continue asking Him to get me out of this, but all of my begging comes to nothing. Thank the Lord that it does!

You see, although we're obviously called to live passionately for Him, to be completely in love with our Espoused King of Kings, we're not called to any sort of "feelings" about it. To love our Lord Jesus Christ, to "seek Him while He may be found", must be done even in automation, and, in fact, being trapped in that sort of phase can be revitalizing in a sense. I want to go to Mass, I want to receive my most precious Lord, I want to pray, I want to go to Adoration; yet perhaps I expect something back from all these, some sort of pleasure for myself, some great feeling of joy. There are certainly times when He gives me joy especially in these times and places, most especially at the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass where I may receive His Body and Blood, but the joy isn't that important. It's my serving Him, my coming to Him at the Sacrifice, my actually praying, my going to Adoration, all of these to be more and more given to my Beloved Jesus that is important. 

So though I may feel automated right now, and it is frustrating and sometimes almost depressing, I know I still need to keep doing what I'm doing for His sake as long as they aren't sinful or near the occasion of sin. I know I need to pray more, I know I need to read Scripture more, I know I need to live in the Spirit more, and a lot of other stuff, but now that I've asked, in the words of the amazing man of God, David Mangan, "Where's the dynamite?", I don't need to worry. I need to do go to Mass even when I worry it won't seem the best, I need to pray when it doesn't seem like I'll be answered, and I need to do all the things He asks of me, because that is how I may love my Lord; doing what He wants even when it feels like I'm not getting better. As long as I do what my Beloved asks of me, He will bring me through all the different moods I'll have to Himself, to live in His love. Until then, may I serve and love my Espoused King of Kings all of my days, and may I be thankful that I can still serve and love Him even in such an automatic mood.

All of you holy men and women and angelic choirs, please pray for us and for the whole world!

All of you readers, please pray for the writers of this page!

Passion: A Burning and Loving Purpose

"As to the Passion of our Lord... Never in anything follow your own will and your own inclination, for that was the cause of His death and passion."  - St. John of the Cross


When most people hear the word, "passion", they often tend to think about 'passionate encounters', the kind you see in bad romance movies or in contemporary T.V. shows (unfortunately). Those things are all about the emotional fires that spark when two lovers meet, although this is usually not what happens in that kind of situation. However, these products of our emotion-driven world do have a small part of truth that, although small in these, is of incredible important: Passion is like a fire, a fire that can consume everything if lived with incorrectly. But if lived with correctly, according to its purpose, can bring two true lovers together in a stronger bond than before. The perfect and most amazing example of this is history's most famous act of passion: The Passion of the Lord Jesus Christ.

The word "passion" comes from the Latin verb "patere", which means "to suffer". Passion for something or someone means suffering for that thing or person, giving oneself completely, life and, in the case of our Lord and His martyrs, death sometimes. In our present times, people focus a lot on "feeling passion", feeling that rush of living for something or someone more than anything/one else, and it ends up consuming them in a flash-fire a lot of the time, turning their life upside down. A lot of wasted time is spent trying to keep that "passion" going so we can keep feeling the rush. But this isn't what real passion is: Passion is suffering for the beloved, it's sacrificing for them, just like our Lord did for us, and it's meant to be lived with continence, with caution and purpose.

When our Lord Jesus took up His Cross, and even before that when He endured the crown of thorns and the beating and the scourging, He was living passionately for both the Father and for us, and it wasn't a quick consuming flash-fire; it was His suffering for His beloved, living and dying for our redemption. His suffering up to and including His crucifixion were how He lived out His love for us and the Father, and it was how the Father was able to draw us closer to Him in love. It was the most important and perfect thing He could do for us; "No greater love has one than this, to lay down one's life for one's friends" John 15:13. Christ lived and died for us in the greatest act of love that was possible, not in some cheap and quickly-extinguished way, but in His entire life and death.

So the question is: What should we do as the Bride of Christ? We're obviously called to be passionate about Him, about knowing Him and serving Him, but how? Most of us probably won't die for Him like He did for us, like the martyrs did for Him, but we were all made with our own ways of living for Him. I write poetry, friends of mine play music, others were given the gift of evangelization, and others still with other gifts. Yet there is a common rule in all of the ways that we have to live passionately for Him: Living, sacrificing, SUFFERING for our Lord God should, above all, be for Him alone.

We often get distracted by a lot of other things and people, and often we can have that rush of burning emotions for them, but we can't really live for them fully, because they can't fill our lives fully. However, God can, and in fact, He wants to! Because of this, He enables us to live and suffer for Him in fullness, to live truly passionately for this One Who we should live our whole lives for, in the purpose of falling more deeply in love with Him and serving Him more and more.

All you holy men and women, especially all you martyrs, please pray for us!

Melancholia: Going Through Depression

"Lord, make me an instrument of your peace; where there is hatred, let me sow love; where there is injury, pardon; where there is doubt, faith; where there is despair, hope; where there is darkness, light; and where there is sadness, joy." 
- St. Francis


It's September now, and in the U.S. this means autumn is coming soon, and with every autumn comes a seasonal melancholy feeling, at least for me. Sometimes people think it's depression, and sometimes they're right. Lots of us struggle with depression, and it's never easy. Even when people tell me, "Don't worry, God will get you through it", I still have that dark feeling of anxiety lurking around for quite some time. Living with anxiety disorder my whole life has never been easy and it never will be. However, that's not what's important: Living this cross of mine, this cross that my Lord Jesus Christ has given to me, is the whole point, because it's by this cross that I've learned to love like He does, and how I've learned to love Him more and more every day.

Especially in the autumnal season, I reflect on my past and become both sad and joyful, sad about all the friends I've lost, all the people who I've seen suffer unjustly, all the people I've seen leave their Beloved King. I'm joyful for all those people, though, because He put them in my life for a reason and He had them leave for another reason, and He let the suffering happen so they could grow stronger, and He let them leave His side because He loves them so much that He respects their free will. And even though the melancholia begins to kick in and may last for a long time, I still thank my Lord that He sent the people and situations to me so I could be His. When we reflect on the past events and people in our lives, we should always be trying to understand what place they had in His plans for us.

Of course, anxiety stuff does still come around plenty of times, and it's not going to stop. But my worries aren't really important, I've found. In the very least, they're a reminder of something that depression makes us forget; trusting in our God is always so necessary, especially when we feel like we don't need to or shouldn't. And there's a perfect reason to trust in Him; He's already got everything set up in His plans for us. I know it's cliche to say not to worry, but it's really what's necessary, because there's no need to! Our Heavenly Bridegroom has already set up the wedding feast, so why should we worry ourselves with pointless things? Although I do find joy in the memories of the past, they still really only serve as a guide for the future, of my place in His will, and of Who brought me home and will bring me back to His side. Though I'm still anxious a lot of the time, I keep learning to trust in His will, because that's where I'll find my way through the darkness of depression and into His light of love.

All of you holy men and women, especially Saint. Dymphna, patron saint of anxiety, please pray for us!

All of you readers, please pray for the writers of this page!

Labor Day (Late): Working in Dryness

"The proof of love is in the works. Where love exists, it works great things. But when it ceases to act, it ceases to exist." - Pope St. Gregory the Great

This past Monday was Labor Day in the U.S, and since then I've been asking both my Lord and myself whether I labor properly for Him, for His holy will. I've been feeling recently like I'm in a state of spiritual dryness, and this has left me anxious and wondering if I'm actually able to do His will right now. I feel like I'm in no state to come closer to Him because it seems like He's so far away from me. Yet today I've begun to realize why this is complete tomfoolery, utter nonsense and extremely detrimental to myself and to others.

A good friend of mine has always told me that feelings don't matter in faith and works of faith, that feelings don't matter much in real love; this is completely true! I said above that I 'felt' a spiritual dryness, that I 'felt' like I'm not in a proper state to do His will, and these feelings have only served to increase my anxiety. However, when I actually think about what I'm able to do for His will, completely by His grace alone, I realize that I can always do His will, again by His grace alone. Obviously if I'm in sin, then I'm less open to that grace, but feeling a state of spiritual dryness doesn't necessarily connote sin. Blessed Mother Theresa of Calcutta once said that, in the later parts of her life, she felt as if God was nowhere near her. St. John of the Cross describes this state as a "dark night of the soul", a time when God lets the soul experience dryness so that the soul can be moved to love again, to desire and to laboring for the Beloved. A dark night of the soul is not at all an excuse to think one can't do His will; it is, in fact, an invitation to work more!

The invitation to work more by our feeling this dryness, by our realizing our anxieties, these dark nights, is necessary for our growth in love. Yet though the feelings do help to trigger it, they are, as said above, nearly unimportant, only serving as the trigger. What 's always more important in these dark nights is our response to them by our seeking to labor more and more in love for our Lord Jesus Christ, Who gave Himself up for us even in the greatest suffering, Who Himself said, "My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?" Even in that pit of despair, Christ, the Son of God, cried out, wondering where His Father was. However, He still died, He still resurrected, and He still ascended and is now seated at the right hand of the Father who He cried to; He still did His work, He still labored in and after the suffering. So it's the same with us: We must not only know of the invitation, we must take it up to work for His will.

St. John of the Cross, in his writing on the dark nights of the soul, says that they're necessary for the soul to grow more in love with it's Beloved Christ; "In tribulation immediately draw near to God with confidence, and you will receive strength, enlightenment, and instruction." We're going to have dark nights of the soul, it's inevitable, and our Beloved Bridegroom allows them to come so that we can search for Him, work for Him, by our feeling away from Him. By our feeling dryness or even despair, He helps us to labor to be more and more in love with Him.